The Benefit of Marriage

I recommend getting married. It's very handy. I've been lead to believe there are all kinds of health benefits and people who are married tend to live longer, but that's not why I'm advocating for it today. Being married is the best built-in excuse for almost anything in the world. Does your friend want to hangout this Tuesday night? Does he also need help moving heavy furniture? Well, you can tell him that you'll check with your wife to see if you have plans. It's virtually unassailable. Even if you don't have any plans, you can say you decided to just have a night in together since you haven't had one in so long. It's the perfect reason to get out of anything, and if people give you a hard time about it, you can make fun of how their marriage (of if they're not married, then their personal life in general) is a disaster.